My whole life I've been right handed. My poor left has been treated as a second class citizen for too long now. When I was growing up I had a friend who claimed to be ambidextrous.. it didn't mean much at the time because we were 7, but since then I looked up what it means and realized that while I may have a natural tendency toward my right hand, there's no real reason why I can't use my left just as good. My body parts are too independent and out of sync where there should be equality and balance. Something I'm always preparing for is the event that I lose something: an arm, leg, vision, hearing... So starting tomorrow for one week I'm changing everything up. My right hand will have to endure what my left has gone through these many years and my left will be treated to a position of high authority, taking care of writing, brushing teeth, and all the rest. Maybe in 8 days my left and right will have a better understanding of eachother's plight and share the workload bringing that hard to find balance to the community that is my body parts.

I measured my wing-span today (middle-fingertip to middle-fingertip, arms stretched out so I look like a giant letter T) and turns out it is bigger than my height if you include the stuff between my shoulders. If you leave that out though it's less than my height. I wonder if I should be concerned. Seems a little suscpicious to me.

Today's arm sketch.. poster edged.

A random sketch on my arm, photographed, and some cool photoshop filters applied. Click to zoom.

Occasionally I sketch, photoshop, and/or photograph things. Those go here.. You can usually click on them for the full size zoom.

Who was the idiot that was drinking something, say a glass of milk, through a straw and thought to themselves, "I'd like to eat my straw now," but alas it was made of plastic and they couldn't. Oh they probably tried, chewing and gnawing at it for a good hour before realizing that food comes in all shapes and sizes and they could make food into a straw like shape and if we could do that we could coat the straw in sugar and chocolate so anyone who's too lazy to stir can still have a nice glass of chocolate milk. Who's bright idea was it to drink whatever we can squeeze out of a cow's tits anyway. Where's that guy? Why wasn't he shunned from society.

The front page of one of the weekly newspapers has a picture of a girl on a horse, and a story about a teen peeing on a car in the mall parking lot in the middle of the night. It's a big deal cause the kid posted a video of it on the internet. Time moves slow here, real slow.
Video

And the story from the paper

Teen urinates on Ferrari

Video of prank leads to nuisance charge, fine

BY EDDIE CHAU
STAFF

What was thought to be a harmless prank has an online car enthusiasts community in an uproar after a video surfaced of a Niagara-on-the-Lake teenager urinating on a car. On July 8, a video of a young man relieving himself on a Ferrari at the Pen Centre parking lot furfaced on the popular video sharing site, YouTube. The video was posted online and on Ferrari websites such as www.ferrarichat.com, where Ferrari owners enthusiasts and the public posted angry comments and threatened the male. Const. Jacquie Forgeron, media relations officer for Niagara Regional Police, said she was made aware of the video by a member of the media. Forgeron said soon afer the video was posted, so was personal information about those involved in the video, taken from the popular social networking site, Facebook. "The angry comments still continue as of now because the video has gotten so much attention," Forgeron said. "From what we know, the owner of the Ferrari lost his keys inside the Pen Centre and asked mall security to watch the car. Security taped off the car in the parking lot. That's when the teenagers filmed the video." Forgeron said members of the NRP Street Crime Unit contacted the youth involved in the incient, who willingly turned himself in. Charged under the St. Catharines nuisance bylaw for public urination is Josh Gifford, 19, of Niagara-on-the-Lake. Gifford was fined $365. "He accepted the fine and appeared remorseful," Forgeron said. Forgeron said police are continuing to moniter online comments. If threatening comments are made to Gifford, police will intervene.
----Niagara this week - Town Crier

Ontario has a graduated licensing system. To drive a regular vehicle you have a written exam, 10-12 months later you can do the first driving exam, and a year after that you do the freeway exam. They let you book an appointment online or by phone through an amazing automated system, I live in an area with a relatively small population density but you'll typically wait less than an hour in line when it's really busy. The staff are friendly and caring and it's actually an unusually calming environment. But there's no signage telling you where to stand, so if you're about to do your freeway exam and stand in the line that everyone else stands in instead of going directly to the unmarked window with no line, you end up missing your exam and having to reschedule and pay the fee again. This should be posted under Idiocy because I've done this twice already [once for the first road test], but the root issue here is not my idiocy, how was I supposed to know where to stand if there isn't a clear legible sign with large black lettering, arrows, and pictures telling me.

Today there were 5 separate people in 5 separate places around town that all had the same weird expression, like it was following me around or something. I think it's a sign the next strain of bird flu is on it's way. I wish I had a fallout shelter. I wish there was an anti-flu something a person could take or be given that didn't actually contain the flu, as that's what I'm trying to avoid. Then again maybe I'm wrong, a bird would have to be crazy to fly in this weather.. especially if they were ill. It's too hot here, too hot. Someone install global air conditioning or patch up the hole in the ozone create an ozone layer, out of tinted glass—call it the Sun-Glass-layer, tint the glass colours so the stars look cool.

You can't only celebrate life once a year, that's what the government wants, for you to get it out of your system and then go on watching tv and remaining a calm, non-disruptive individual. The time it takes for the earth to gravitate around the sun is not justification for celebration unless you're excited about the fact that every year we get a little closer to that fiery ball in the sky. [Orbiting is the same as falling if you don't have a means of propulsion]. How CAN anyone be excited about that, unless they've done the calculations that the sun will burn out and/or explode/black-hole-ify before earth impacts and are planning a scheme to lure all the people and things they don't like onto "that" side of the earth. [the side that gets squished, cracked, or in the case of a black hole.. noodle-ified first]. Also the "Happy Birthday" song is owned by a subsidiary of AOL/TIme Warner, meaning they can sue you and win if you sing it at someone's party.. UNLESS you sing it in parody or only sing a small portion of it that's unrecognizable.. either way you should videotape it cause the awkwardness of a sarcastic happy birthday song, sung acapella to your bed-ridden grandmother in the 'home' could be funny later when you watch it on youtube after uploading it.